The Love Formula
We’ve all heard phrases like “all you need is love” and “love is the answer” and ‘the power of love” etc.
While we may feel there is some underlying hidden truth to these statements, for many, that truth can get overshadowed by images of stupid romantic comedy stereotypes or our last less than perfect romantic relationship etc.
But what if statements like these are really true when we consider this one distinction about how love might really work?
What if instead of viewing love as something we experience because of a certain arrangement of our circumstances: the perfect person, the perfect job, the perfect moment, the perfect – fill in the blank here, what if we view love as something that we are to choose to bring to our circumstances whatever they are, and that love IS what allows us to experience the feeling of love while also often times making the circumstances more lovable.
What if love is not something that is a scarce limited resource that we have to work hard to attain and then to maintain, but what if of love is a power that is always available to us to feel and to use to transform all circumstances?
What if the mistake that most of us have been making about love is that we have viewed it as something only available to us when stuff happens in a particular way.
What if the opposite is the truth? What if love is actually something that is not separate from us, but it is something that we must choose to bring to the stuff that happens in order to feel it?
What if in order to be “in love” all we need to do is understand that love does not come from any stuff and then choose to bring the love that is always available to us to whatever stuff is happening?
What if we can be “in love” and really feel that way no matter how messed up things might look in any particular moment?
What if we didn’t have to wait, hope, dream, strategize, plan, negotiate, worry etc to be “in love” anytime and every time we wanted to feel it? How amazing would that be?
What if interacting with love in this way also had the added benefit of allowing your circumstances to become more lovable?
What if all the stuff you thought was keeping you from experiencing love is really the greatest gift given to you to bring out the love (in you) where it really comes from?
I’m in the process of developing a new set of transformation tools right now and I’m finding that when we don’t experience love in a particular circumstance, it is because our brain is assuming that we are limited in some way by the circumstance.
If everything above is true, then our brain is making a mistake when this happens.
I’ve found that as once we become aware of the limitation, that it is not real and that that it has been keeping us from feeling the love we want, our brain is quick to let it go and feeling “in love” is the result.
If you want, try out these 3 simple questions the next time you’re in a situation that’s less than easy to love and see what happens. Simply say the 3 phrases to yourself and wait for the answers your brain comes up with between each one:
1) How am I not loving this right now?
2) What limits about me must I be assuming are true in order to feel this way?
3) Notice without these limits I am loving everything.
-Andy